Your personality makes you who you are and how others see you and perceive you. Your personality is also the framework others use to judge you, appraise you, and build any form of relationship with you. It is also the one cognitive characteristic people use to reject you and deny you any possible opportunity to fulfill your goals and dreams. Unfortunately, for the most part, the way you perceive your personality is not usually the way others perceive you.

Your personality is the blueprint and foundation of your past, present, and future.

Your cognitive character forms your personality, and it is intrinsically linked to your emotions, behavior, wants, and needs. Your character classifies the basics of your personality traits, your attitudes, and behavioral patterns. It is what makes you unique in your own ways. Like fingerprints, no two people have the same personality as these traits have outstanding cognitive characteristics that will make them unique and different from the rest of the world.

Being aware of what drives your behavior, emotions, and choices is the first step to learning who you are and what you want.

Although learning about yourself could feel at times overwhelming, that information will give you the much-needed foundation to make responsible choices. By responsible choices, I do not mean choices required or accepted by general social standards but choices that will make you accountable and reliable of your own decisions by your own standards. It seems pointless to mention that those standards are based on your moral and civic principles, as well as your customs, culture, system habits, motives, and convictions.

With it, you have built a unique defense mechanism. That defense mechanism is an unconscious reaction working full-time for your ego. It is that defense mechanism, your ego, and your emotions that protect you from external conflicts. At times, such a defense mechanism might inhibit you from accepting reality as it is perceived by the reasonableness of most people in our society. As such, the denial or self-negation of one’s reality does not allow you to perceive the truthful nature and consequences of one’s and other’s actions.

A defense mechanism is a normal means of surviving and coping with the problems you face everyday and the actions you see and perceive as a threat against you. Knowing yourself gives your unconscious self-defense mechanisms the freedom to make decisions based on the truth of the facts, rather than perception and wishfully thinking. Self-awareness gives you a better understanding of your actions and needs, which can provide you with a better control of your life as you want it now and as it morphoses to interconnect with your future.

Your personality and cognitive characters are connected to your emotions. Be smart about it and learn the characters that make you who you are. It is a rough road to drive, which makes it the most rewarding when you get there.

Iberkis Faltas, Ph.D.

#emotionalintelligence #personality #character #management #leadership

Something we frequently forget

laughter: A vocal expression of amusement, enjoyment, or derision, characterized by inspiratory and expiratory movements occurring in rapid succession. Laughter is pleasurable because it serves to release tension built up when people listen to an amusing story or watch an amusing event. Laughter may also result when states of threat occur in a safe context or from an abrupt resolution of a cognitive incongruity. In psychoanalytic theory, laughter may be viewed as a defense against crying or embarrassment. Unrestrained or paroxysmal laughing spells have been found to precipitate cataplectic attacks, to be a common manifestation in manias, and to be an occasional symptom of psychomotor seizures among children (

Create the habit of practicing laughing–even if about yourself–now and then. A laugh will change how you see and perceive those around you as you become more self-aware of your strengths. Some might view a laugh as a manifestation of weakness or a vague expression of the mind. Instead, laughter is an expression of the soul that should be appreciated, understood, and welcomed tenfold because, without it, our world becomes dark and shadowed by sorrow and difficulties.

Iberkis Faltas, Ph.D.

#emotionalintelligence #management #leadership #selfawareness

SELF-AWARENESS: Who Am I? Who Do You Want Me To Be?

If someone close to you asks you at this very second to describe who you are—besides your name and address—would you be able to tell precisely about yourself?

Would you be able to identify—without hesitation—your wants, your goals, your motivations, your weakness, and vulnerabilities? What makes you stronger, and what makes you cry?

Or would you tell them what you think they want to hear about yourself?

Well, you are not alone. Most people cannot clearly define who they really are. Instead, they find themselves describing either the person they would like to be or the person they believe others want them to be. Most cannot specifically verbalize what they want for themselves, even less what they want from others.

Lack of self-knowledge is an everyday challenging issue that prevents most individuals from drawing specific information about themselves, even when that information is right in front of their eyes. Lack of self-awareness can lead you to build a virtual person, an imaginary personality about yourself that, for the most part, goes far beyond reality, and it only exists to fulfill the requirement you perceive and believe others are expecting from you.

Lack of self-awareness can lead to excessively high–almost impossible self-expectations, setting you on a dark road that could end on depression, harsh self-judgments, self-discrimination, and self-stereotyping. Those are false impressions that will sabotage you, block you from achieving your goals, and stop you from following the path to self-independence and self-adaptation. That lack of self-awareness deviates your consciousness away from you. Instead, it concentrates on what others want from you, which does not always lead you to your desired goals and purpose.

Develop your self-awareness.

Self-awareness helps you to center your energy and attention on yourself in a positive, constructive way. Developing self-awareness will embolden you to make distinctions between the things you want and the things you need. Those distinctions become the blueprint of your objectives and goals, helping you focus on being yourself, rather than a reflection, a mirage of what others want you to be for their own satisfaction and ego.

What you can do:

Get in the habit of observing and analyzing your actions. You might discover things about yourself you never knew before. Those distinctions are what make the differences between subjective self-awareness and what makes you who you are. Those distinctions become objective and subjective self-awareness. Subjective self-awareness rises from observing yourself, your experiences, perceptions, actions, and overall behavior. Objective self-awareness arises

 from a comparison between the self and (a) the behaviors, attitudes, and traits of others or (b) some perceived standard for social correctness in any one of these areas.

Pay close attention to yourself and focus on developing and growing the characteristics you know about yourself. The information you’ll discover about who you are might not be pleasant or even welcoming. You might disagree with yourself and be in denial of your own reality. But that is not bad at all. It helps you to be closer to yourself and build the bridge on the road to accept yourself as you are. But you have to go deeper into your consciousness and pay close attention to your thoughts, longings, needs, yearnings, and aspirations. Pay close attention to your emotions.

Learning who you are inside and out will prevent you years of trying to find yourself in others. You will become an independent person—mentally and emotionally, as you will not have to wait for others’ acceptance to do what you think is right.

Self-awareness is the foundation, the framework for personal and professional development, heightening your communication skills, attention to details, learning your vulnerabilities, focusing on your internal and external wellness.

 It is the capacity to learn how to evaluate and analyze your actions and thoughts. It is information that will reset the organic configuration structure to make better, responsible decisions. 

The lack of self-awareness can lead to anxiety, excessive concern about your traits and characteristics. It is that excessive concern about yourself that can sometimes lead you to believe you are not doing enough for your present and future. It leads to an alter pessimistic vision of yourself, leaving you unhappy, discontent, sad, and disappointed about all your actions. Making you believe that nothing you do is worth doing.

Take some time to learn self-awareness. Become a subject matter expert on yourself. Lear your subtle physical, cognitive, and physiological changes happening withing you internally and externally and embrace those changes. Enjoy those changes. Learn what prevent you from feeling comfortable and fortunate and do something about it—just knowing not always fix the problem. Doing whatever you can about it fixes the problem.

Become aware of yourself. Learn your eating habits, your sleeping routine, and what triggers your mood changes, leaving you emotionally and physically drained. Learn what makes you the person you are and be proud of it. Take some time to find your internal motivations. If you have difficulty concentrating, take some time to learn why. What is bothering you on the inside,  affecting your productivity and concentration. Knowing yourself help you to find those answers faster.

Self-awareness is essential for making decisions, solving problems, communicating, setting objectives, reaching goals, and building positive, rewarding relationships. You cannot do everything for others if you don’t first learn to do some things for yourself.

Dr. Iberkis Faltas

⁣#personaldevelopment #mindfulness #emotionalintelligence #selfawareness #selflove #mentalhealth #wellness ⁣#lifeadvice #emotionalhealth #selfgrowth #healing #mind #psychology #cognitivo #selfcare #saludmental #motivation #personalgrowth #mentalhealthawareness #emotions #me #mentalhealth #personaldevelopment #success #emotionalwellbeing #empathy #inspiration