There are many reasons why people walk away from relationships. We can only assume. Unfortunately, only the person that walks away knows why. But it doesn’t matter what, never think it was because of you, because it was not.
Here are nine reasons why a person walks away from a partner:
A difference in morale and character.
A difference in beliefs.
Failing to build a connection at a deeper level.
Different places in life.
Fear to commitment.
Feels that you are too much of a woman for him.
Lack of internal self-support to help him (or her) overcome self-doubts.
Lack of an external support system to rely on.
As you can see, age is usually the first thought, but based on my experience, it is the last reason, which is why I didn’t bother to include it here.
If you find yourself abandoned by someone you thought you would spend the rest of your life with, rather than resist, being in denial, or drown in your own pain and misery, unleash your natural self-protective instincts.
You have been a survivor all your life. Remember all the challenges you have been going through since you were a child, as a teen, a young adult, and then adulthood. Sometimes, all those bad experiences condition you to respond to emotional situations with a self-destructive mind.
And the way you deal with your feelings, emotions, dependency, vulnerability, and of course, abandonment will revert your survival instincts.
If your partner walked away from you, protect yourself.
You do not want to leave your open wounds exposed to everyone to see because they can get infected with the worst toxicity around you. And to be honest, you don’t want to expose your emotions to negative opinions, and poisonous thoughts because it will only make things worse.
Remember, when you’re in a relationship, you are two. You have goals as a couple. You make plans as a couple. You build everything as a couple.
If that person was never there to be your plus one so you could have a life as a couple, he was the one that failed you. Not you.
Girlfriend, if that person was never there for you, it was because he (or she) felt he would not be able to live to your standards. Your partner will distance you when he thinks he will never fulfill your goals or be good enough for you.
Here is the thing,
When someone feels vulnerable, threatened emotionally, that person—instinctively will choose the path of less resistance and that path sometimes is another woman.
This is why, not all women are alike. We are all different inside and out. Some of us have higher standards than others. Some of us have loftier goals than others. Some of us are higher achievers, goal-getters, with an organic progressive character that will not settle for mediocracy.
And then, there are women that will settle for anything to sleep with the devil, because they don’t know how to be a woman without the approval of man.
And because of those internal challenges, they will settle for anything. Those are women men keep at a minimum wage, unaware, under a leash, tight control, constantly disrespecting her, ignoring her, yelling at her, which is easier and take way less effort than being appreciative, respectful, grateful, inviting.
Listen girlfriend, when a man leaves you, don’t think it was because the other woman was younger, more beautiful, or a better person than you in any way or form.
When a man leaves, it is because he chose the path of less resistance, less compromising and less commitments. He picked someone that will not challenge him in any way or form and will support the mediocracy he feels inside. He left you because he can now dominate that person to his wish and control. He left because now, he can do whatever he wants to that person without any consideration for that person. Now, he doesn’t have to communicate, compromise, challenge himself, rise to your standards, your challenges, your virtues, your morale and good character. He left because he was dysfunctional, and you are not.
He just couldn’t handle the fact that you were a better human that he was, and that vulnerability he felt, he did not learn how to deal with it. That was not your fault.
And even if it wasn’t true, he believed in his vulnerabilities more than what he believed in the you and the life both of you could had or continue having together. He was the one that left. You didn’t lose him. He lost you. And there is a humongous difference in there.
Now get up, be the best you can be, and don’t allow anyone to make you feel that you are less than perfect.
Grieving is a normal process of the mind under the core emotion of sadness. Grieving can be activated with any emotional trauma that causes deep sorrow on you. Sometimes, it reflects anger, disappointment, frustration, depression, guilt, resentment, loneliness, and many other secondary emotions.
Everyone in this world has gone through some form of grieving. It is highly devastating your morale, motivation, drive, and will continue moving on along with the course of life. And while time makes things better, the truth is that time itself does not end the emotional pain. It helps you to learn how to live with it, but time does not erase the emotional pain.
Here, I will not ask you to move on or forget about it because it doesn’t work that way.
However, to help you heal, I will ask you to take time to understand your pain and where the pain comes from. You also need to be aware of how you are responding to the pain: are you been angry, frustrated, sad, or you just don’t know how you’re feeling, which is completely normal.
The next step is to recognize the type of emotion that you’re experiencing and accept it.
Accept that you are not invincible. You are not made of concrete or stone. Like every other person on this planet, you have the right to emotions and feelings.
Even when in denial, that is a type of emotion, and you need to accept it.
You also need to treat yourself with compassion. Stop bullying yourself. Stop being so demanding of yourself. Allow yourself to feel the emotions connected to your grieving because, believe it or not, your self-acceptance is one of the healing steps.
Also, talk to someone that knows how to listen. Talking about your emotions puts them into perspective, and it helps you visualize where you are and where you want to be.
And remember, always go back to your support systems.
You will never let go, and you will never forget because your memories are part of your life, who you are, who you will be.
But you’ll learn how to live with them and move on with them in your life, because it doesn’t matter what, life won’t stop there just because that is what you want. And listen, my friend, believe it or not, time is on your side, and it will help you be okay.
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